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Will this go down as my greatest crime against humanity?

I can’t decide if I should feel distressed that one of my Wikipedia entries directly led to the creation of the Martha Stewart entry on Wikipedia.
Allow me to explain myself. A link to a non-existant article about Frank W. Woolworth on a page in my watchlist was bugging me. So I wrote up Mr. Woolworth, which led me to do a writeup about the company he founded. Now I was born long after the five-and-dime’s heyday, but the concept was so central to many people’s memory of the 20th century that it bothered me that it wasn’t there. And even though Woolworth’s company is a shadow of its former self today–so much so that I wouldn’t be surprised if you thought it was out of business–Frank Woolworth invented the techniques that made Sam Walton the richest man in America.

I guess a cynical take on history could be that Frank Woolworth dramatically changed the look of downtown America, a century before Sam Walton destroyed it.

Woolworth’s five-and-dime stores evolved into the modern discount store we know today, which led me to write up an entry on Target Corporation and make significant additions to the entry on Kmart Corporation, since Woolworth at one time had two chains that competed directly with two of Kresge’s (now Kmart’s) chains.

Then someone noticed the Kmart entry didn’t mention Martha Stewart. Next thing I know, Martha Stewart has an entry in the Wikipedia.

Now Martha Stewart joins the long list of pop-culture icons who have entries in the Wikipedia.

I guess I really should go back to researching Microsoft.

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7 thoughts on “Will this go down as my greatest crime against humanity?”

  1. Malls and cheap land at the time put downtown America out of buisness, but Walton destroyed small town America.

  2. David, you have always seemed to be the stormy petrel. Your latest action seems to be well within character.

    I do not visit retail establishments, preferring to obtain my goods through custom construction and my personal channels of acquisition. A true aristocrat would never be found in a place with “mart” in its name. Therefore, the meanderings of those who dupe the socially wanting into buying inferior items mass-produced in Asia mean little to me. They are merely people with a good deal of money, and money does not buy nobility, as R. Collins plainly exemplifies.

  3. A Raunche-setta stone:

    Aristocrat n. One who works the word of the day into every conversation.

    Personal channels of acquisition n. Aspirants who buy mass-market merchandise, remove the “Made in China” tags, replace them with tags that say “Made in France,” triple the price, and sell to unsuspecting aristocrats.

  4. Since turnabout is fair play, I present my corrections and additions to the preceding R. Col-ostomy Bag of Words:

    Aristocrat n. One who contributes the word of the day.

    Clansman n. (barely) One of barbarian heritage, who is often publicly jealous of those who contribute the word of the day. Antonym: aristocrat

    Meal, six-course n. A fitting feast for an honorable aristocrat, served by his white-gloved stewards. Usually precluded with an aperitif, served with an array of fine wines, and concluded with a vintage cognac.

    Me food n. (Scottish) All parts of the sheep that can be chewed with the teeth you have left. An after-dinner mint may follow.

    Me drink n. (Scottish)
    1. Distilled spirits of one’s own making. Ripple.
    2. Fetid water, usually not previously used as one’s toilet, and sometimes clear.

    Limousine n. (Scottish) A John Deere lawn tractor with tinted windows and a grass catcher. Useful when your homeland is one big lawn with mud buildings.

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