Self publishing to success

There was a thread on Slashdot on Friday about self-publishing, the result of a review of a self-published novel. I found it pretty interesting.
People complained about the price of the book. I looked at Xlibris’ pricing. Had they published Optimizing Windows, it would have sold for about $4 less than it did.

People talked about self-publishing as a sign of poor quality. Unfortunately, anything is a sign of poor quality. If it’s published by a publishing house, marketing is paramount, rather than quality. Don’t listen to the publishers who claim they think about quality and nothing else. It’s a lie. Some publishers are worse than others. There are a lot of publishers I just won’t buy a book from, period. There are a lot of authors I won’t buy a book from, period. (And don’t bother trying to give their books to me either; I don’t want the other books on my bookshelves to look bad by association.)

The author of the book complained about Xlibris’ pricing being designed to make money off the author rather than the readers. That’s true of every self-publishing company. To a degree that’s true of the big publishing houses too. The terms of places like iUniverse and Wildside may be more favorable.

The author of the book complained that he made $2 per copy of the book. If I remember right, my royalties for Optimizing Windows, had everything gone well, would have worked out to about $1.75 per copy. And that’s actually not bad. Some of the authors of Dummies books make 25 cents per copy. The hope is that they can make it up in volume. Sometimes that happens and sometimes it doesn’t. If your name is Andy Rathbone and your book is titled Windows [whatever] for Dummies, you’re going to sell a million copies so even if you only get 25 cents per book it’s worth your while to do it. Though I’m pretty sure Andy Rathbone gets better terms than that.

While Optimizing Windows didn’t sell terribly well, it outsold some of the Dummies books, including some written by authors who were more established than me.

There’s a misconception out there that writers are rich. Writing books isn’t like big-league baseball, where the minimum salary is more than $200,000 and you get a minimum of three months off (and that’s assuming you’re a pitcher or a catcher and went to the World Series). You get an advance and you write your manuscript. Hopefully the advance is enough to pay your bills while you write, or you have money from somewhere else. The advance is taxable income. You’re self-employed. So the government’s going to take half of it. Some creative financing and tax planning can soften that blow a little.

Authors pay that advance back in the form of deferred royalties. Once a book sells enough copies that royalties cover the advance, the author starts getting checks every quarter. But when you pay $25 for a book, the author’s getting a small percentage of it. It might be as low as 25 cents. If it’s five bucks, that’s really high. Paper isn’t cheap and presses aren’t cheap, so most of what you’re paying for is the printing cost. The publisher and retailer make a few bucks and the author makes a couple of bucks.

I met an author last month who’s sold more than half a million books. He drives a Hyundai.

An awful lot of authors could make more money doing something else for a living. Those who choose to make a living writing are doing it for prestige or independece or enjoyment, much more so than for the money.

So I’m not convinced that self-publishing–especially print-on-demand self-publishing with little or no up-front cost–is a bad idea. Now that’s not to say I’m going to run out and self-publish immediately. But the thought’s crossed my mind a few times, yes. And if I had enough material already written for one reason or another to make up about half of a book (the half-book I wrote two years ago about Linux doesn’t qualify–I’d have to buy back the rights to parts of it), I’d probably write the other half and do it, for exactly the same reason that some musicians choose to self-publish.

Linkfest since I’m busy

I wasted way too much time with this, so I’m passing it along.
Parliament of Whores. Ed Felten, the star of the Microsoft Antitrust trial, and infamous anti-DMCA activist, has a blog. I like his stuff. I especially like this: a list of devices that would have to have copy-protection hardware under the insane Fritz Hollings I-Sold-Out-to-Hollywood bill. Bookmark it and visit it weekly. Get a good laugh. Print out copies and send them to your congressman. Send one to mine too, while you’re at it. Dick Gephardt needs something constructive to do.

Benke for First Vice President. If you’re LCMS, you can make nominations for the 2004 Convention. Here’s the form. Unfortunately there’s no box for me to nominate Dr. David Benke, the man who dared go to Yankee Stadium on Sept. 22, 2001 and pray with heathens lepers infidels non-LCMS Lutherans present, for the office of First Vice President.

If anyone knows where I can find that form, I’d appreciate a link.

Meanwhile, yeah, I think Dr. Benke belongs on the LCMS Board of Directors and the CPH Board of Directors. Getting him on the Commission for Theology and Church Relations would make it much easier for the rest of the Body of Christ to deal with LCMS. And since he actually (shock, horror!) talks about his faith, he’d be good on Mission Services, too. And we’d do really well to have hundreds–no, thousands–more pastors just like him, so putting him on the Board of Regents for both the Fort Wayne and St. Louis seminaries would be an excellent move.

Boy, I’ve got plenty of work for him, don’t I?

But I’d really like to see him at 1VP.

As for Dr. Benke’s crimes against Lutheranism and humanity and God, evidently, the Apostle Paul was guilty of the same crimes. St. Paul was awfully abrasive sometimes, but I wouldn’t mind having him in one of our top leadership spots. Since we can’t get St. Paul, I’ll settle for Dr. Benke.

Too busy for Aimee Mann

One of my friends e-mailed me and asked if I’d be breaking my usual policy of not watching TV except during the World Series to catch Aimee Mann on some TV show called West Wing tonight. Or maybe it was tomorrow. Whenever it was, my response was terse.
“Dang it! I don’t have time for that!”

I’d mention our ensuing dialogue, but I’m afraid some of it might be taken out of context and haunt me later. Oddly enough, it was my second conversation of the day where illegal mind-altering substances came up.

Most of my attention is going towards moving. If Aimee Mann were single, I’d probably take time out to watch her and swoon, just because I’ve heard far too many comments lately from single girls about Bebo Norman. But Aimee Mann’s not single so I shouldn’t be oogling her, and I don’t have to have an inferiority complex about Bebo Norman.

No, that money on the dresser isn’t my savings fund for an acoustic guitar. No, those aren’t lyrics in that notebook. No, I don’t have an inferiority complex about Bebo Norman! I don’t know what I’ve got but I know it’s not that!

I’m looking for an easy cure, easy cure
An easy cure for my ills

AAAAAGH!

I could never find my way
You said you were the way, the truth, and life
They said it was impossible
You said anything is possible
With you
And that’s why I celebrate faith

Ha! Did Bebo Norman ever write any lines as good as those? He did? Rats.

OK, fine. I’ve got an inferiority complex about Bebo Norman. So sue me.

I’m gonna go move big, heavy stuff and assert my manliness. (I bet Bebo Norman couldn’t LIFT THIS COUCH all by himself!) You go read a comic strip or something so you’re laughing at it and not at me.

I’m back.

My DSL was down for about 36 hours, possibly longer. Southwestern Bell evidently was able to fix it during the night.
I’ve got to get in to work to babysit a server and call Compaq and scream bloody murder for not dispatching a technician when they said they would. I’ll be back in a while.

How to get started in the IT industry

Someone asked me today what I do.
“You know those computers the size of a dorm fridge? I work on those,” I said. And yes, sometimes that means crawling around and sticking my head inside one, I added.

“Aren’t you afraid you’ll break something?”

“Oh, I break stuff all the time,” I said. “Then I fix it.”

And that reminded me of a story.

One day when I was about 17, my Dad came home one afternoon and found me in the basement, with our computer disassembled–completely–and sprawled out across his table. His eyes got really big. “You gonna be able to put that thing back together?” he asked, without much hope in his voice. “Sure!” I said. He watched me pry a ROM chip out with a screwdriver, pop in a new one, then reinstall all the drives, the power supply, and the expansion cards and replace the cover. I didn’t have any pieces left over, which I think he took as a good sign, and then he watched me plug it into the keyboard and monitor. I fired it up, and it worked perfectly.

I still had an awful lot to learn though. At work, you’re supposed to have pieces left over. What, you think employers actually buy their techs those great PCs on their desks? Ha! And a tip for you beginners: After the new system performs like swamp sump because you just swapped out all the good parts with parts from the old clunker on your desk, just blame the disappointing performance on Microsoft bloatware. Works every time.

(And when your boss starts asking how all these parts with Micron stickers on them ended up inside a Compaq server, just say, “Dan must have done it.” Who’s Dan? Who cares! He’s not you!)

Nobody knew that I knew how to do that. Every once in a while when I was the only one home, I’d take the computer apart. That afternoon, I just happened to get caught.

You are looking at a genu-ine inventor

In yesterday’s comments, I suggested you take the David Crowder Band’s CD, Can You Hear Us?, and put it in your CD player and glue it shut because you won’t want to change it anyway. (I really ought to write up a proper review. I’ve managed to graduate to their other disc. It’s good. Not glue-worthy though. Unless you’ve got a changer.)
Well, I should have patented the technique. Maybe I could still file. A method of protecting intellectual property, I’ll call it. Why?

Because Sony’s in the habit of sending out review CDs in Discmans that have been glued shut to prevent unauthorized bootlegging. They also permanently attach the headphones–no copying out the headphone jack, naughty naughty.

I guess they didn’t count on a journalist being handy with snips and a soldering iron, did they? Oh, wait. I’m not exactly a practicing journalist anymore. Well, not professionally, anyway.

I smell a way to make some money and stick it to an RIAA member, don’t you?

Toss your web browser

Mozilla 1.1 is out. It’s faster and more stable than 1.0 (which was no slouch itself). It’s what all the cool kids are using. You know you want it.
Get it here.

In case you have no idea what I’m talking about, Mozilla is open-source Netscape. It’s nearly 100% standards compliant (it recognizes a few old Netscape-only tags), it’s very quick, but it adds a few tricks Netscape won’t give you. One, it includes facilities to block popup ads. And if an offensive ad comes up during your regular browsing, just right-click the ad and pick “Block images from this server.”

Go get it.

Well, that was unproductive

I didn’t do much yesterday but lay around and read ancient Dave Barry columns.
Well, I fixed a longstanding problem with Debby’s site (debugging PHP code is such a pain when the curly braces don’t all line up) and I returned a batch of car fuses I bought a couple of weeks ago that it turned out I didn’t need. Six bucks is six bucks, you know. That’s lunch for two days if I’m careful.

Other than that, I took a nap. Actually I might have dozed off twice. I don’t remember. It was a tough week. On Monday I got paged at 11:30 at night with a tape backup problem and ended up having to go in to work to fix it. Tuesday was quiet. Wednesday and Thursday I got paged late. How late, I don’t remember. But late enough that I’d gone to sleep. Wednesday’s problem I fixed remotely. Thursday’s problem might or might not have been fixable remotely, but the operator kept talking about blinking lights on the tape drive (it’s an internal drive, and I’m convinced he was referring to the blinking lights on the hard drives) and multiple blinking lights on a tape drive usually indicates big trouble, I ended up going in. I stumbled through the problem and finally went home. It wasn’t a hardware problem.

On Friday one of my coworkers took a digital picture of a tape drive for me so I can ask pointed questions about the blinky lights if when the problem comes up again. Looking at the picture, now I remember: blinky lights on the left is big trouble. Blinky lights on the right is highly unlikely, so I guess that’s even bigger trouble.

On my way home from Promise Keepers on Friday, I told my buddies I fully expected to get paged that night about a tape backup problem. They all thought that was pretty awful. I got home, plugged my work laptop in and booted it up, intending to be pre-emptive. I didn’t want to get paged at 1 in the morning and get told a 9:00 backup job failed–not when I needed to be at church at 7 in the morning with an 11-hour day (minimum) ahead of me. As I was firing up pcAnywhere, my phone rang. It was one of the operators, and a backup job had failed. I went in and fixed it.

But, seeing as I didn’t sleep more than six hours uninterrupted any night this week and operated two nights on four (I know, when parenthood comes I’m in trouble, but I really work best on 7 hours during the week and 8 on weekends), I slept in yesterday. I was late for church. The 10:45 service. Pathetic, I know. Then there was a post-service meeting I’d forgotten about. Oops. So I was there for two hours. They mercifully cut it off at two hours. I was out of fuel and was getting irate at the weird questions some people were starting to ask.

Then I came home, got irritated that my SWBell e-mail still isn’t working (six days and counting–makes me wonder if they’ve ditched their Sun equipment for Windows NT), tried to remember how to set up my own mail server again, decided it was too much thinking, and took a nap instead. That set the pace for the day.

I’m hoping this week isn’t a repeat performance of last week.

I’m not ready to come back yet, but here’s someone who is

Give me another day or two to get over my shellshock. Aleve makes me feel like I just drank three pints of Guinness. I’m sure my boss will be thrilled to hear that.
In the meantime, if you want something to read, go check out this. Debby is a member of my church. I can’t remember right now if we met two or three years ago. She’s fighting the battle of her life right now, so when a mutual friend came to me and asked me to set up a Web site for her, I jumped at the opportunity.

And before the Kaycee Nicole references come up, let me say this: I know Debby. She lives less than five miles from me. Her younger daughter, Wendy, works the same place I buy my groceries. Her older daughter, Heather, went to Mizzou with me, though I don’t know if our paths ever crossed. Her teacher’s assistant is in my Bible study group. I’ve worked on her computer a few times. I still remember how Wendy laughed when Debby came in, saw their computer open, looked at the dust inside it in horror, left the room, and came back with a dustrag. I’ve played with her dog, I’ve ridden in her car, I’ve seen the classroom where she teaches. Just as certain as I’m a real, living, breathing human being, so is Debby.

My neck hurts.

My neck hurts. I’ll be back when I feel better. I don’t know when that will be.
See you later.