Things my sons say to me as I leave for work

Every morning I say goodbye to everyone as I walk out the front door to leave for work. Including the dog. I always tell her not to let any cats or squirrels in the house. Last week I added mooses to the list too. Mooses in the house would be really bad. (Yes, I am aware that “Moose” is plural, but my dog isn’t.)

I always tell my sons to have a good day at school. My oldest usually says, “Have a better day at work!” He’s nice.

For the longest time, my oldest son always added, “Make sure your boss gives you silly worksheets!” He assumed I do the same things at work that he does at school. I guess that makes sense. But lately he and his younger brother have come up with some variations of that.

“Have fun babysitting vendors!” my oldest usually says now. Great. He thinks I’m one of the world’s highest-paid babysitters.

But my youngest can top it. “Make sure your boss needs groceries!” he says. I had no idea he knew what groceries are. Maybe he does and maybe he doesn’t, but he seems to think I do my boss’ grocery shopping.

I hope he doesn’t read this and get any ideas. I hear his kids eat a lot.

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