Your new customer service manager's name is Dev Null. Please refer all further communication to Dev Null, who will handle your matter speedily and appropriately.
Or something like that.
It sounds just believable enough that lots of people will fall for it. The problem is getting anyone with Unix familiarity to keep a straight face while saying it.
Coincidentally, BOFH fans will also know that /dev/null is an incredibly fast backup device.